Young Rettostein

Started by Kueller, April 25, 2004, 03:45:59 PM

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Kueller

April 25, 2004, 03:45:59 PM
 Young Rettostein
   *(a young weasel in a professor?s coat is seen in a classroom)*
Weasel: So, today we are going to learn the difference between reflexive and voluntary motion.
*(two people walk in with a man on a stretcher)*
Weasel: Mr. Wolf Bite here-- whom I have never worked with in the past-- has kindly volunteered to demonstrate for this class, the difference between those motions.
*(Wolf Bite waves and class waves back)*
Weasel: So, a reflexive motion is made by the brain-- without any thought process of our own-- *(Weasel goes on in a seminar)*
*(continues in decipherable speech)*
Weasel: Now, I will demonstrate here, with Mr. Wolf Bite, a reflexive motion.
*(he moves next to Wolf Bite and acts as if to knee him in the stomach and says)*
Weasel: You dibbun-eating mangy bilge-rat!
*(Wolf Bite covers his stomach with his hands and jumps back)*
Weasel:  That was a reflexive motion.
*(Wolf Bite is looking at the weasel, rather terrified)*
Weasel: However-- if we have these nerves deactivated, by freeing them of oxygen, we would be completely helpless.
*(Weasel puts a clamp on Wolf Bite?s temple and Wolf Bite stiffens up)*
Weasel: You dirty, mother killing vermin!
*(Wolf Bite simply stands still)*
Weasel: Without these nerves being exposed to oxygen, we would collapse.
*(Weasel takes off clamp and Wolf Bite collapses)*
Wolf Bite: Uuuugh!
Weasel (whispering to one of the people with the stretcher): Give him an extra dollar.
Weasel (to class): All right, any questions?
Juby: Yes. Doctor Rettostein-
Weasel: My name is Rottostain.
Juby: Er, doctor Rottostain. Isn?t it true that the great scientist Ragefur once kept a worm alive in an oxygen free jar?
Retto (as we now know him): Yes, I heard reports of something like that, but worms-- in most cases-- are not weasels, rats, stoats, badgers, mice, moles, otters, wildcats, or any other manner of sapient people.
*(class laughs)*
Juby: But, wasn?t that your grandfather?s basis of work? The reanimation of dead tissue?
Retto: My grandfather was a very sick man.
Juby: But, as a Retto- Rottostain, aren?t you the least bit curious about it?
Retto: My grandfather was a madman. DEAD IS DEAD, do you hear me?
*(class is scared)*
Retto (sighing): Class dismissed.
*(rat walks up to retto)*
Retto: Yes, what is it?
Rat: I have an item that may be of great interest to you.
Retto: Go on.
Rat: It is the will of your grandfather-- Baron Kilkenne von Rettostein!!!
*(curtain closes)*
"The only difference between a tax man and a
taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin." -- Mark Twain

"Suppose you were an idiot.  And suppose you
were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." -- Mark Twain

 "A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to
his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off
with your money."  -- G.  Gordon Liddy


"I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a
bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle."
-- Winston Churchill



I am not a member of the recent group of Star Wars peoples, nor am I copying them.

user posted image


One of my favorite all-time Star Wars scenes (from Darksaber):
Shoot the enemy! Kam Solusar commanded. Reflexively, the gunner followed the order. He fired both heavy laser cannons at full power. The Imperial Juggernaut exploded under its own firepower. Kam Solusar ducked, but the trunk of the Massasi tree shielded him from the flying shrapnel. He shook his head in disgust. "Stupid idiots," he thought, then slipped off to meet another target.

Nohcnonk

#1
April 25, 2004, 04:10:00 PM
 *blink*

Angst Vulpine

#2
April 25, 2004, 04:43:48 PM
 Blasphamy! :o

:lol:  
Angst Vulpine  
-Unofficial forum artist, and resident furry..Now an Unchallanged Retto Fangirl, and owner of teh one and only  Retto Plushie, OtterSocks, Big Plushie Donut, X-mas Wolf Bite Plushie, A Pink Lightsaber (With a flower coming out the end), and a TGF Plushie!

I have the X-mas Wolf Bite plushie. It's mine, no one else has a Wolf Bite plushie, except Teufel, she's got the original one.  Mine's wearing a Santa Hat. <3

IFman

#3
April 25, 2004, 05:15:59 PM
  :blink:
make it more realistic
I'm so tired of being lost in a world,
Where no one can find me.
I want to break free of the cage,
That has been enclosing me for too long.
I know that I am alone and no one will save me,
So I am to escape for myself.
I wander down a path,
That will go on for eternity.
I shall never reach the end,
I am trapped no matter where I go.
Though I finally manage to reach the end,
I must fight the monster inside of me to pass.
It is filled with so much anger, hate, and despair,
The only antidote is love, courage, and hope.
The three things I do not have,
And never will.
It is there that I give up,
I have nothing left but myself.
So I lay down forever,
Never going to get up again...as I fade away from all existence.

Juby (Tercios)

#4
April 25, 2004, 05:28:11 PM
 SCORE, I was a charecter!
Real Betis? ? -? ? Tottenham Hotspurs? ? -? ? Partizan Beograd? ? -? ? Hannover 96

windhound

#5
April 25, 2004, 06:39:38 PM
Quote from: IFman:blink:
make it more realistic
more realistic  :lol:  that was more or less the script from the odd movie young frankinstein..

quite spiffy..  hee
A Goldfish has an attention span of 3 seconds...  so do I
~ In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded ~
There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't

IFman

#6
April 25, 2004, 08:13:59 PM
 I know
I'm so tired of being lost in a world,
Where no one can find me.
I want to break free of the cage,
That has been enclosing me for too long.
I know that I am alone and no one will save me,
So I am to escape for myself.
I wander down a path,
That will go on for eternity.
I shall never reach the end,
I am trapped no matter where I go.
Though I finally manage to reach the end,
I must fight the monster inside of me to pass.
It is filled with so much anger, hate, and despair,
The only antidote is love, courage, and hope.
The three things I do not have,
And never will.
It is there that I give up,
I have nothing left but myself.
So I lay down forever,
Never going to get up again...as I fade away from all existence.

Pewee

#7
April 25, 2004, 08:32:49 PM
 That was cool. Kinda weird... but cool.




Now, excuse me while I try to figure out what all that meant...
~* Diana/ Beautiful Disgrace *~

...One by one, the penguins steal my sanity...

" Lonliness and the feeling of being unwanted  are a mans worst poverty"
- unknown

somewhere theres someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worth while, So when you are lonely, remember it's true: somebody somewhere is thinking of you

I thought I was all right and was moving on strong, but then I realized I was fooling myself, my thoughts were all wrong.


"Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe"

wolf bite

#8
April 25, 2004, 11:23:33 PM
 Much better me gettting slapped around then the last role play where I was Gollum.


Wolf Bite
********************
Grand Master Wolf Bite
********************
Wolf Pack =  Klowd19, Blood Wake, Sonoras, Giggles

Stan(NM)

#9
April 25, 2004, 11:47:44 PM
 I didn't really like it, boring and all...
Retarded, actually.
Should be moved to the spa room.
 .~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~.
.  A man's solace is in his independence,   .
. my solace is found with your ignorance.  .
 '~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'

Wildwood

#10
April 26, 2004, 06:33:27 AM
 Yea I didn't like it much either.  A little too weird for me.
Apparently people are getting angry at me for having too long of a sig. when all you have to do is press three buttons to not veiw someone else's sig. if you do not want to see it so I no longer have one *grumble* lazy people *grumble*.  Whew! Run on sentence.

Oh big fish I took out the pictures.  Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

Lol big fish is the word for cr.p
user posted image

~>John<~

#11
April 26, 2004, 09:58:18 AM
 In your opinion stan. To oppose stan, kueller should keep going. With me in a role :)
QUOTE
Heark! For the City of God comes before us!
And so he asked, "How is a man to judge in such times as these?" and he was answered, "As he always has judged, for good and evil have not changed and the differences are as great as they have ever been."

Former Emperor

Former Member of Rome

Ashyra Nightwing

#12
April 26, 2004, 09:59:16 AM
 Yep. Keep on going, Kueller!

Kueller

#13
April 26, 2004, 01:17:10 PM
 
*(Curtain opens)*
*(Retto is standing next to Julie by a train)*
Retto: Goodbye, my sweet darling.
Julie: Yes, goodbye.
Retto: If you were to sum up our relationship in a few minutes, what would you say?
Julie: How can one explain such a magnificent kaleidoscope of love in just a few minutes? But, if I were to try-- you?ve got it, mister.
*(Retto bends over to kiss her)*
Julie: No! Not on the lips. There?s that party at Ad?s tonight, I don?t want to have lipstick all over my face.
*(Retto bends over to kiss her on the cheek)*
Julie: No! I?ve got that blush, and you know how it smears?
*(Retto, looking exasperated, tries to hug her)*
Julie: Ah! The dress, the dress, it?s silk, it wrinkles very easily.
*(Retto and Julie link arms)*
Julie: Goodbye!
Conductor: Aaaaaaaaaaall Abooooooooard!
*(curtain closes)*
*(curtain opens at an eerie looking train station)*
*(Retto walks with his luggage, one small bag and a suitcase, towards a walkway whilst creepy music plays)*
*(As he walks, music gets louder)*
A voice: Hallo!
*(Retto jumps about ten feet in the air)*
*(He turns around to see who the voice is)*
The person: Are you Frederick Rettostein?
Retto: That?s: Frederick Rottostain.
Person: Wouldn?t that be Froderick Rottostain?
Retto: No, it?s Frederick Rottostain. And you must be Peace.
Peace: That?s: Payce.
Retto: But they told me--
Peace: Well, they were wrong then, weren?t they?
*(Retto looks confused)*
*(Retto, patting Peace?s shoulder (which is has a hump), says)*
Retto: Well, glad to meet-- oh. You know, I?m quite a brilliant surgeon. I may be able to help you with that hump.
Peace: Wot hump?
Retto: Er, never mind.
Peace: Shall I help you with your bags, mahstah?
Retto: Why thank you, they are rather heavy.
*(Peace grabs the little bag)*
Retto: Er, thanks. Where is the castle?
Peace: Walk this way.
*(Peace, with a cane, shakily walks down some steps, then stands up straight again)*
*(Retto starts to walk down)*
Peace: No. Walk this way.
*(Peace does an impression of his hobble and hands Retto the cane)*
*(Retto hobbles down the steps and hands Peace the cane)*
Peace: That?s better. Now, this way.
*(Retto follows Peace to a horse-bound wagon)*
*(Peace throws the bag in the wagon)*
*(Retto puts his suitcase in the wagon and hears an ?Oof!?)*
*(Peace starts wagon going and Retto Falls in)*
*(curtain closes)*
"The only difference between a tax man and a
taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin." -- Mark Twain

"Suppose you were an idiot.  And suppose you
were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." -- Mark Twain

 "A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to
his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off
with your money."  -- G.  Gordon Liddy


"I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a
bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle."
-- Winston Churchill



I am not a member of the recent group of Star Wars peoples, nor am I copying them.

user posted image


One of my favorite all-time Star Wars scenes (from Darksaber):
Shoot the enemy! Kam Solusar commanded. Reflexively, the gunner followed the order. He fired both heavy laser cannons at full power. The Imperial Juggernaut exploded under its own firepower. Kam Solusar ducked, but the trunk of the Massasi tree shielded him from the flying shrapnel. He shook his head in disgust. "Stupid idiots," he thought, then slipped off to meet another target.

Angst Vulpine

#14
April 26, 2004, 01:27:10 PM
  BLAST YOU JULIE! BLAST YOU!  You know better then to take someone away from someone else, don't you?!

*cries*

*mutters something like "RWL satire"*
Angst Vulpine  
-Unofficial forum artist, and resident furry..Now an Unchallanged Retto Fangirl, and owner of teh one and only  Retto Plushie, OtterSocks, Big Plushie Donut, X-mas Wolf Bite Plushie, A Pink Lightsaber (With a flower coming out the end), and a TGF Plushie!

I have the X-mas Wolf Bite plushie. It's mine, no one else has a Wolf Bite plushie, except Teufel, she's got the original one.  Mine's wearing a Santa Hat. <3
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